You must keep in mind that a recovered traumatic memory does not make for a multiple. And the physical discomforts that a person may be experiencing could simply relate to a troubled past filled with stress and anxiety without being multiple.
We all know that when we are under a certain amount of stress that our bodies may suffer as a result with headaches, shoulder and neck pains, heart trouble etc. But as of yet there is no set guideline for treatment of MPD/DID that the psychological community has agreed upon, plus there is still the question of whether this disorder can really exist within that community.
However all one needs to do is talk to the survivors who have resorted to this method of survival and created their own system (a defense mechanism) to truly believe that they are indeed suffering. Because the treatment for DID is still undetermined, there is no particular method that can be absolutely duplicated to fit each survivor and their systems. However I believe that a basic guideline can be followed for every survivor with MPD/DID.
I have done quite a bit of experimenting and research during my healing and below are some ideas that have helped me through the process.
Reflexology
Reflexology is a massage therapy that you can even perform on yourself with the hand, ear and head pressure points.
Many years ago I got a severe migraine headache one day (of many days) and barely made it to the Chiropractors office. When I got there I told him NOT to touch my head; actually I threated to kick him if he did. Well he went straight for my feet and after about three minutes of massage, my migraine was completely gone.
If you will click on either of the images below (they will both take you to the same page), you will be redirected to the interactive, color chart that will show you what pressure points to massage to ease pains of every part of the body. It takes a little practice but try to concentrate on one area and practice on that and see if you get any relief. Wishing you health and wellness!!!
There are also books available at that site that you can purchase to have on hand for all of your physical and mental needs.
Therapy
This is your chance to unload all of your thoughts and feelings! You need to deal with the past and bring the secrets into the light in order to let it go and begin living your life as a healthy adult. Just like the ordinary individual enters into therapy in order to resolve issues that are disrupting their lives so that they can continue to live healthy, more stable lives, we multiple have the right to the same treatment! In therapy your ears begin to hear what only your thoughts have been keeping quiet!
Medication
Whether you are severely depressed, have anxiety disorder, PTSD or any other mental disturbances; medications are extremely helpful in the aid of your therapy and treatment. Don't forget that there are many types of drugs (for just one condition such as depression) so it may take a while and many different changes in your prescriptions to get just the right medications that are right for you. By all means, if the first or second or even third prescription doesn't work out, don't give up!
Hypnosis/Meditation
This is a wonderful technique for the therapist to encourage the survivor to learn healthier ways of coping with life through hypnosis (a deeper state of relaxation without losing consciousness or falling asleep)! Actually if you are a survivor then you've probably induced yourself into a hypnotic state of mind for years and just weren't aware that you were already using this technique. You might even begin to learn how to "relax" (self hypnotize) at home so that your body does not become overwhelmed with all of the mental activities.
Journaling
Journaling can be a tremendous tool! After an alter has documented a memory, thought or emotion then you and other alters can go back and read it. This begins to break down the barriers that have kept the alter personalities segregated and amnesiac to each other. The information that is being shared now within the system starts to trigger other alters memories as they learn about and meet each other within the pages of the journal.
Art
Painting and drawing are also extremely useful, especially for the recovered memories that are just too horrific to express the intensity of an episode with mere words. You might even surprise yourself and find that your talents are much more advanced than you ever dreamed they were.
Writing
If you decide to start writing anything such as poetry or short stories or even building your own website, you might find that the healing process could be enhanced. Remember the more you write (whether it's journaling, poetry or whatever you decide to write), the more you will learn about yourself and your alters. Who knows, writing could actually be your "calling"!
Support
Learning how to build a healthy support system can be beneficial in so many ways! When you begin to attract healthier people into your life, you are "learning" how to be a friend in a healthy way. The toxic people are the ones who feel better about their own self at your expense (such as sarcasm, laughing at, making fun of and embarrassing you) will now begin to lose their power as you learn from your new healthy friends how to reject negative input from others! You are much better off with the new (respectful, caring) friends who can build up your self-esteem and treat you with the respect that your "spirit" thrives on.
Of course like I said every multiple will respond differently to any guideline, just as non-multiples respond different with any treatment. The most important thing to remember as you go through your journey to mental health is to stay safe!
My own personal thoughts are that "Healing" does not mean integration! To heal is to be healthy and happy, and eventually your alter personalities may indeed decide to take that final step into wholeness!
Psychotherapy
Tips on finding the right therapist!
Before you begin your search for a therapist I recommend contacting your insurance co. while you are at home, alone and can think clearly and at you own pace! (I had to deal with everything all at once in the doctor's office and the ins. personnel that I was speaking with became very angry because I could not focus on her questions), so it's better to do it at home.
Ask for a list of therapist's in your area that is covered by your insurance policy. If the ins. co. does not have the information about the particular field that the therapist specializes in, then you call the office and simply ask.
Find out what your CO-payment will be for each session (so you will be aware of exactly how much of the bill that you will be responsible for, there's no need in hidden surprises and this will allow you to schedule your appointments so that they are spaced out enough for you to be able to handle the payments).
Then, I suggest that you make four lists'! Remember these are only my suggestions of issues that I think are most important so feel free to make your list's as long or short as you like!
The first list should be the symptoms that you are experiencing. Don't leave out any thing, the smallest details can be extremely important. The second list is for the qualities that you prefer in a therapist. Remember that you are the employer and it is up to you to make sure that you get what you are looking for and need.
The third list is the issues that you should focus on during your initial interview with the chosen therapist and questions that you may need to ask. And the fourth list is for you to evaluate your interview! And don't forget that not only is the therapist interviewing you, but you are also interviewing him/her as well!
Symptoms!
1. Depression! 2. Memory loss! 3. Confusion! 4. Mental disturbance! You should elaborate here, explaining how you have been feeling and acting and any physical signs such as vomiting, loss of sleep, lack of concentration, etc., and anything else that has disrupted your daily functions.
Qualities you prefer in a therapist!
1. Do you prefer a male or female therapist?
2. Do you prefer a Christian therapist?
3. What age range of the therapist would you feel more comfortable with?
The Interview!
1. Does he/she believe that MPD/DID is a legitimate disorder! And even ask if they had treated anyone with this disorder (If indeed you suspect MPD/DID,)
2. Ask if he/she has ever witnessed an angry alter in other multiples and how he/she deals with these alter personalities.
3. Voice any other concerns that you may have during the interview no matter how small you may think the subject may be; if it's big enough to be concerned about then it's well worth mentioning.
Interview Evaluation!
1. Did you feel safe and comfortable with the therapist? The therapist should be more than willing to make you as comfortable as possible and should expect to be interviewed by you just as you are by them.
2. By all means if he/she displayed any negative vibrations, quickly mark them off the list and move on.
3. Did this therapist handle the switching of you and your alters in a positive way? A good qualified therapist who has dealt with other survivors with this disorder will totally understand that he/she must repeat a lot (if not all) of what is said in the beginning stages of therapy.
4. Did you feel that the therapist was maybe "too" eager to diagnose you with MPD/DID? You must, must, must, be very cautious of any therapist, psychiatrist, medical doctor or anyone else in the field that tries to convince you that you are multiple. That is not their job!
The therapist should gently offer their support of what ever you are experiencing and may even offer different scenarios to help you in your healing. Of course at some point the therapist will divulge to you your diagnosis if you ask, but this should never be the main focus of your therapy, except when you are ready to deal with it, and even then the therapist should be very careful so that he/she does not try to confuse you any further or plant any false accusations in your head.
5. Lastly, when you walk out of the office from the initial interview trust your instincts! A. Did you feel comfortable in the presence of the therapist? B. Did the therapist seem comfortable with you? C. Do you feel that you can tell that person every single detail of your life, even though you may not know what those details are at the time? D. Did you feel supported? Did you feel safe (well as safe as you can possibly feel under such circumstances)? E. Do you feel that if you were to make an emergency phone call after hours to this therapist that your call would be received in a pleasant and supportive manner?
Of course you must limit such calls so that during extreme emergencies your call will be accepted as a true emergency, rather than just another after-hour call. Remember that your therapist does have a life outside of the office and simply must be allowed their space so that he/she can stay mentally and emotionally healthy in order to help you and the other clients that they have.
The therapist should always be in control and stay consistent! This is very helpful because there is so much inconsistency within the MPD/DID system.
The therapist should never make any suggestions of abuse and should never imply how an alter might be feeling about a memory, event, a person or any situation. They should never rush a memory and should always let you or your alter parts make the conclusion of a certain thought or memory.
In general the therapist's position should be to listen and help you to validate your feelings and emotions and to encourage you to verbalize every possible objective. After an obvious switch has been made he/she should make sure that the new alter that has just appeared knows and understands what the last alter was experiencing!
By doing so he/she has introduced the two alters to each other, thereby beginning to break down the barriers that keep your mind fragmented. They should ask questions to help you think, but not too much as to confuse you. (I'm sure you're already confused enough as it is!).
I wish you well in your search and if I can help, please don't hesitate to write me. I'll help as much as I can from the survivors point of view!